@Salty Candy As a depressed person who went to therapy I can tell you, you're not lazy you just need help, and it's not bad to seek it.
Living is hard and it will always be, until you decides it's not, then even if it's still complicated you can find it easier.
I'm personally still struggling everyday because of depression, I have difficulties doing basic things, like getting up, going out, talking to people, working, cleaning, eating, trying to find motivation to do anything really, but I got way better than before.
Four years ago, I used to not brush my hair and teeth, shower only one or two times a week, I would never clean my appartement letting it become an absolute disaster mess, and I would never go out if I had a choice on the matter.
I thought life wasn't worth it, I thought that dying would be easier, but I was too afraid of the pain to actually act upon it, I lost a lot of opportunities by waiting, and the relationships I had with the people I hold dear to my heart became more and more complicated because of it.
It's a feeling and a sensation that never left me, but it doesn't mean that it has to bury me, you can reach out, you can break the barriers, you can get out of the madness, don't let yourself be buried.
It doesn't have to be be a big action, it's all about small steps, like taking a shower, or deciding to go get a haircut.
Be proud of those small steps, be proud of how better you'll get even if it seems insignificant, because those small steps are proof that you are starting to heal.
I believe in you, your life is worth it, take this answer as encouragements, no pressure, I know how annoying moralizing comments can be.
Good luck man, and even if tomorrow isn't any better than yesterday, remember there is many other tomorrows to come.
Living is hard and it will always be, until you decides it's not, then even if it's still complicated you can find it easier.
I'm personally still struggling everyday because of depression, I have difficulties doing basic things, like getting up, going out, talking to people, working, cleaning, eating, trying to find motivation to do anything really, but I got way better than before.
Four years ago, I used to not brush my hair and teeth, shower only one or two times a week, I would never clean my appartement letting it become an absolute disaster mess, and I would never go out if I had a choice on the matter.
I thought life wasn't worth it, I thought that dying would be easier, but I was too afraid of the pain to actually act upon it, I lost a lot of opportunities by waiting, and the relationships I had with the people I hold dear to my heart became more and more complicated because of it.
It's a feeling and a sensation that never left me, but it doesn't mean that it has to bury me, you can reach out, you can break the barriers, you can get out of the madness, don't let yourself be buried.
It doesn't have to be be a big action, it's all about small steps, like taking a shower, or deciding to go get a haircut.
Be proud of those small steps, be proud of how better you'll get even if it seems insignificant, because those small steps are proof that you are starting to heal.
I believe in you, your life is worth it, take this answer as encouragements, no pressure, I know how annoying moralizing comments can be.
Good luck man, and even if tomorrow isn't any better than yesterday, remember there is many other tomorrows to come.