@Banana Maria is a good woman with trauma of her child leaving her(died), she did not want to feel another experience of that trauma with Alan so she threatened him to tell the police as a blackmail so that Alan won't leave her. She is just a woman who is hurt and traumatized. Alan thinks of his self as a sinner because he turned his back on G** and his parents to love a man . He felt as if he sinned just by being born that led his parents to worry.He felt unloved because his life revolves around the church, the place where he was raped by a priest and all his parents do is pray without actions. This is the best thing in the story. Everyone's feelings are explained properly and deeply which makes you understand their feelings with an open mind.