Comment by TheSimpQueen on Miracle Illusion - Chapter 44

@TheSimpQueen I was thinking about that.
It was easier for MC to love that strong, happy and carefree version of ML. It was easier for him to accept the love that comes with rainbows and sunshine. But when ML is also hurting and grieving, well... I think its easier to receive than to give.
Depression is a serious illness, but it also helps you undertand pain. Understand the fear of been all alone. Thats why I'm starting to dislike MC, for pushing away the person he says he loves when ML is the one suffering, when there is no rainbow and sunshine anymore.

@Loveless I feel like you guys have never experienced depression — or maybe depression just looks different for everyone. I understand the MC so much atp. It leads us down paths we never wanted to take. It makes us so insecure that even when we know it's not right, we can't stop. We see everything in the most pessimistic way, even when we know it's not the truth.
I know it's easy to judge the MC, but depression makes him see everything through a broken lens. You push people away not because you don't love them, but because you're convinced you'll only ruin their life too. It's not about choosing to be the victim; it's about being unable to see yourself any other way.

@Tinker I think depression might be different for everyone. In my case it made me more sentitive to peoples emotions and struggles. I found myself thinking "is that person also experiencing this same amount of despair that I am?" And I ended up putting my suffering aside to try and understand others.
Therapy helped a lot, along with medication, but it took me a while to learn that I cant put my own suffering aside in order to help others, in order to give the help that I wished I had.
But we are humans, so its just normal for each and every one of us to deal with our negative feelings in a different way.
Its just that MC reactions was so different than mine, that it was hard for me to relate.