A lot of people are confused and it's not you- it's the garbled translation. It makes the character's thoughts and dialogue really incoherent.
Basically Euihyun has accepted that being Taeju's "wh***" is the best he can do for his little brother and himself. He would like sweet and nice and normal but he can't have it. So Taeju is better than being raped by a whole bunch of men or working jobs that will never cover the debt or allow him to be with his little brother. His little brother staying in school is super important to him. So he's terrified of Taeju losing interest in him.
Taeju realized he wants Euihyun for himself and not just sexually. He wants to bind Euihyun to him. And that a purely transactional "debt slavery" relationship isn't strong. When the debt is gone so is Euihyun. He is starting to empathize with his pain. He can see how much anxiety the one sicko who Euihyun punched all the way back causes him so getting rid of that guy would help Euihyun and so would catching his shi*** Dad and putting the debt on him instead. He raped Euihyun and has been using him as a s** slave but seems to finally be realizing that isn't going to make Euihyun actually want him and he should do better but he's still Taeju so it's wrapped up in crazy.
Tldr: Euihyun is desperate to remain Taeju's s** slave so he can live. Taeju finally wants Euihyun to be more than his s** slave so that he won't leave or rather can't.
People who want Euihyun to have a baby right now... I cannot. Euihyun has no idea Taeju thinks of him as more than a s** slave and Taeju must atone! Horrible timing.
stay soft get beaten, only natural to harden up
