@Critical Clarity The 1st kill isn't the hardest. Stuff like that is said by people who have never killed anyone. As long as it's fast, most killing is easy. It's dealing with the body afterwards, seeing their faces in your mind and hearing the voices later that's difficult, especially when you aren't 100% sure that you were justified. Seeing death is just a generally difficult thing because it doesn't make a lot of sense to the brain until you've experienced it enough to become numb to it.