@Terru_chan I've read it. Only MC is in denial. I was vague on purpose in the comment before.
Spoiler!
I said it's gonna hurt because they do it without lube. MC does it on purpose, because he wants it to hurt, but I don't remember anymore if it's because he wants to get rid of his growing feelings for ML or because he's angry.
ML is crazy in love (or more obsessed) with MC since the first time he met him on the night MC's father died.
ML is crazy in love (or more obsessed) with MC since the first time he met him on the night MC's father died.