@Book  I agree with you, I often try to hide the fact that I care about other people's opinions and many people believe it but this is just a pretense, because in reality I do care about what they think. But pretending you don't care saves you, because other people don't have the good feeling of knowing they've hurt you and done you harm.

@Book  I, on the other hand, cannot justify his actions, by choosing you he has borne the responsibilities of having chosen you and as such he has no right to complain, much less to slap you, I find it immature and senseless. "time heals wounds" a phrase that I hear so often, many say it is true, others say not, what do you say?

@Book  I know this feeling, not knowing what's happening to you, not knowing anything about anything because deep down you know something but you can't talk about it, it's happened to me a lot too and I also have a habit of saying "I don't know" especially in simple questions like do you want to go here or there? Things like that, I found myself being subject to chance, I never know how to choose and I prefer that others do it for me, it's a much simpler solution.

@Book I know that probably ,I have my share of mistakes but it makes me angry that I too have been excluded from their outings many times and honestly I have never complained because I think it is their right to want to go out even without me, what's wrong with that, we don't always have to be together. The thing that bothered me the most is that when one of my akicas started crying she started telling her that it wasn't her fault and she shouldn't cry, things like that and I agree it wasn't her fault but that meant that it was someone's fault and since she didn't say anything to me I think it was my fault. I was still a child, small and stupid and she was an adult, she had a thousand ways to say things, why there, why with that tone, I don't understand. Sorry for venting but this episode still haunts me in my nightmares, I think it's one of my childhood wounds

@Book Hi its been a while! Sorry for not responding you but I was really busy with the school. When I try to hide kindness, like saying no, I always feel guilty for rejecting their request and like they needed me and I couldn't help them, I hate disappointing other people, a lot of people hate doing it but I feel like it's he**. I don't know if you've ever felt like that, I think most people are scared of other people's opinions, even if it's a little. People can be so scary sometimes that it's hard to ignore them, sometimes I'm scared of their reaction too, what if they freak out and start screaming and doing dangerous things, it's scary or maybe it's just me who's too anxious.

@Book For you last messages, when I read what you wrote I honestly got mad. I don't understand how your teacher could slap you just because you made a mistake, I don't think it's fair and the teacher should pay the consequences. Because first of all that was not a situation where he could act like that, secondly he is a TEACHER and as such he SHOULD NOT ALLOW himself to do something like that.

@Book  It's curious how in the feelings you want to hide there is also kindness, usually we tend to hide our flaws, can I ask why? You said that by nature you are very kind, how do you hide it then? Since you shared your experiences I would like to do the same! Unlike you I do not consider myself a kind person at all. My kindness often comes from external agents, like someone asking me for help and stuff like that. I love when I do a good deed, like lending a pen or explaining something to someone who did not understand, I like the feeling of having been useful to someone else but I do not think of this as kindness, it is more my pure selfishness to feel fulfilled. Because for me kindness is an act in which you sacrifice something of your well-being for another and you still feel good even if you are damaged. I'm similar to you in the case of emotional support. I hate comforting others, because I don't know how to do it and if I were feeling as bad as they are I honestly wouldn't want them to comfort me.

@Book  Yes, what you said is the main reason why I don't feel like I did a good thing. Contact with "the other" is very important in these cases, because in that way the homeless person can in a certain way be actively responsible for his survival. Being able to give him the money personally would honestly make me feel better.

@Book  I read on the internet that some people lose their true personality by constantly changing their masks. Every time I think about this fact I get the shivers because not recognizing yourself anymore is scary. When the one who should know you best is you and suddenly even that knowledge is not yours. I have always been afraid of not knowing who I am and at the same time I am terrified of knowing who I am, because let's face it, no one can know us 100%, not even ourselves. The masks that we human beings wear are in a certain sense objects inherent in our soul, as a means of survival and civilization. If we were to behave the same way with our friends and with a stranger it would be a bit embarrassing, don't you think? I also try not to show my emotions in front of others, we are similar in this aspect, because feelings make me vulnerable and I don't want to be. I'm curious about one thing, what is the emotion that you have the most difficulty hiding? Do you have one? Sorry again for the late reply, I'll try to reply sooner!