Comment by Ashes 🚬 on BlueBay

@BlueBay Bro atp y'all are brainwashed. He didn’t “ignore what she wanted.” He genuinely believed she had lived a comfortable princess life because she never told him about the abuse. You can’t expect someone to respond to information they don’t have.
From his pov, he was marrying a noble lady who grew up privileged. So of course he thought treating her gently and spoiling her would make her happy. That wasn’t control. that was acting on what he believed was true.If she never opened up about being bullied by her own family, how was he supposed to know she didn’t want that kind of treatment? Communication goes both ways. And This isn't a modern office job situation, it's literal war. War is not a joke, it's deadly. She followed him secretly into an active battlefield without telling him, didn't even know  , and almost died. Of course he was angry. That's not control, that's fear and love. He didn't get mad at her He got mad because she risked her life. That's a normal reaction from a husband who just realized how close he came to losing his wife. Yes, she wanted to be useful. Yes, she has agency. But agency doesn't erase consequences. Choosing to walk into a war zone is objectively dangerous. Being worried about your spouse in that situation doesn't make you toxic.
If he had tried to imprison her, abuse her or belittle her skills, that would be different. But reacting emotionally after she nearly died in war? It not that he doesn't care. Both of them are acting from trauma. He protects because he fears loss. She fights because she fears powerlessness. That doesn't make any of them wrong. You should read the novel.