@mexipoopy I mean that's the point, ian is broken down and completely lost, he knows what he wants; A life outside the gang where he doesn't have to hurt anyone. But this goal of his is blurred by all the trauma and fears he has, and it's holding him back. Jo and Tj represent two paths Ian can take, the "dark" one or the "light" one, and rn he is in a limbo. That's why the author has pointed out that this will be a loong story, Ians will after a long journey through his emotions reach a decision and the life he wants.
Comment by B on mexipoopy
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@B ah ok that makes sense if this will be a slow burn, but now that just makes this s** scene in particular feel rushed but I can see that being done on purpose to emphasize how wrong it should feel to the reader.