Yes I know self cure its not exactly recommended but since I'm dependent of my mother because I don't have a vehicle because they only want me to study my bachelor, I have one but since I don't use it then she use it to go to work and get my brothers form school, and that's why I have no transportation to go to a professional, neither I have my own money and there's no public transportation here, I know that if a talk to her she might fight a little but she would think about it, I haved many times trying to talk but she is aware of the way she is and she immediately shuts me, she dislikes when I take out that topic, the past year I really felt that I hit the bottom with a deplorablestate of mind, I spent almost 2 years with a depressed personality and I knew that I couldn't try to change the way I was but I was aware that I was not fine, still she saw and avoid the topic but she really tried to care of me by motivating me to eat and to go out with my friends (wich I don't have now), my personality and my state of mind now it's pretty decent from how it was a year back and that's way I'm trying to work on that...I'm grateful for your concern, I promise that I will work this issue and I wish all the best to you all