Comment by Rex8786 on Friday Night Broken Hearted Alliance - Chapter 25

@Rex8786 hes an adult man, if it was the ml you would say the seme? you cannot defend the indefensible; now let's use the same logic to serial killers and psycopaths with a sad backstory , we understand them, but we do not justify them, if someone treated you that way, you'd be like "oh, poor thing, they didn't mean to betray me , they've just had a very sad life🥺"? if that's the case please, have a little self respect, have a good day

@Renheng I’m sorry if you misunderstood what I said, I kinda struggle to express myself correctly in English. First of all, it’s not a logic you can apply to serial killers like you said, it’s different and has nothing to do with it. Of course I’m not blaming Tako (I think thats his name) for what Olphin did, and what I say doesn’t erase the fact that what he’s done is extremely rude, even stupid. But the thing is that Olphin probably suffers from a mental disorder, something like borderline or idk. I’m not trying to say “oh yeah what he’s doing is totally okay”, of course not. I don’t really know how to explain, but it’s like Im not trying to justify that, and to just act like it was nothing, but at the same time you can’t blame him for this. I don’t wanna talk about myself cuz that’s kinda corny, but I’m only saying this because I understand what Olphin feels like. Of course, it never was in a situation like this, but I understand his “logic”, and he’s actually not the one controlling it. Basically, when you love someone and they leave you, you then feel empty, and need to find someone to feel loved again. You find that person, and they also leave you. Then, you feel even more empty than before. And let’s say that this happens 5 times, idk how many boyfriends Olphin had. You now crave for affection, but you’re used to it ending a bad way. Then you find someone, again, and at first it’s perfect, but just like your previous relationships. You’re so scared that you’re gonna get hurt again, that even tho you can’t help loving that person, you push them away, because you know how it’ll probably end. Also, about Olphin going back to the other man (I don’t remember his name) it can be that when you’re used to be with toxic partners, you also find “comfort” in toxic, or violent relationships, because thats what you’re used to. I hope you understood what I said because I kinda rushed that

@Rex8786 So, to start my comparison was totally spot on. He did something messed up to someone, just like a serial killer or a psychopath would (What they did has a different weight; I’m not putting it on the same level as serial killers. It’s just about the way you have to judge the actions of someone who hurts another person). Let's be consistent here; I’m consistent with my takes. I get that you want to understand the character That’s fine—I also like analyzing characters in all their facets. But don't come telling me, 'Oh, we can't be mad at him because he had a rough life and hard experiences.' First of all, if you're hurting, you go to a therapist—especially if you're a grown, vaccinated adult. Second, if people leave you, you don't have to force yourself on someone. You take care of yourself and come back stronger and healthier. There are such double standards in the BL world, I'm sick of seeing protagonists do awful things while everyone rushes to defend them. It’s unbelievable. You’re trying to understand him, sure, but there’s a huge difference between understanding a character and defending them at all costs. I don’t care about his tragic past; if he hurts someone, he has to pay, just like everyone else otherwise,there is no justice. Honestly, many couples in these BLs just need to break up. There is zero self-respect for the seme—they just blindly chase these npc protagonists around without getting anything back (except for being a simp or for the saints "yearning". They get treated poorly, they're never justified( unless they are so incredibly good-looking that straight girls fall in love with these characters and then try to justify everthing they do). I don't care what happened to him as long as he doesn't hurt others. If he wants to destroy himself, fine, but don't drag other people down into his tragedy. If you're hurting, go to a psychologist; don't get into a relationship just to drag someone else into your personal h*l. That's exactly what he's doing. I did understand your perspective, and it makes sense, but it still doesn't justify him. At the end of the day, he is hurting someone. Hiding your traumas under the rug as if they don't exist won't make everything magically disappear. No, they'll stay there; in fact, they'll get bigger and bigger, always bigger, until boom, they explode (it's obvious that not everyone is aware of this; we are all different, we all experience different things—some people get it and some don't. Because of their own issues) have a good day 🤍

@Rex8786 are you trying to talk about traumas bonding? Aka when someone develops “a powerful emotional attachment that develops between a victim and their abuser”?

@Renheng not to be mean but even if someone’s an adult there still human and make mistakes being an adult dosent change the fact that they can still have problems and mental issues..

@Ungar edit to this because hello :D I agree that if someone dose something bad they deserve to be punished for it but the punishment should be something that allows them to grow and learn from there mistakes otherwise your just punishing someone with no way of them actually getting better.

@Ungar yes I think that’s it, but maybe I said something wrong because I don’t know much about it

@Rex8786 nah man I got what your trying to say all good was just trying to see if the simplified term was what you were going for

@Ungar ah also it’s a bond you develop with someone because your stuck in the cycle or abuse for so long you forget how to get out of it. (Similar to that) it’s also adjacent to Stockholm syndrome (when a kidnapped person falls in love with there kidnapper) because there mind is slowly changing to believe it.

@Ungar yes that’s it thank you