i don't get why people feel sorry for adolf. although i get the regretful end, he put lewis through he**. i don't give a fu** whether it's because he knew about the sickness too late, or that they loved each other for ten years, adolf deserves the mental pain he's trying to endure.
between him and ivan, i feel for ivan more.
it was obviously implied that lewis died still in love with adolf which is hard for ivan himself. he came in to lewis' life a little late yet he made the most out of the remaining days. i'm pretty sure it was hard to cope with knowing he was the second option and that lewis' held on to him just to cope as well. i'm not wronging lewis, but it does happen in reality and it's a big possibility. although ivan was fine with it, which hurt even more. ivan wanted to be there for the man yet it really isn't his place to do so in the end, and i'm pretty sure he's going to have a successful life ahead.
anyway, i cried so hard bro i just had to write my feelings out in here. definitely was a good read and i don't know how i'll recover...
@dane as for lewis... i feel so sorry. and this is why i will not ever forgive adolf for what he's done. there can not be excuses like "but adolf still loved him 'til the end". you realize the value of something when you lose it, and that's how adolf caught up with how cruel he is. which is indeed not a valid reason to validate his doings. it was most especially hard for lewis knowing that the person you've loved for years has just grown tired of you out of the blue, and as hard as it gets, you're attached and devoted to the other. there is almost to no escape from it, lewis knew and felt that until he passed.
this proves that love is powerful and hurtful at the same time, even in a span of years love can change drastically. this is such a beautiful story.
@dane I agree with your comments. To respond to "I don't get why people feel sorry for Adolf"...I will only say what is clear and basic. We are human. we make a lot of mistakes. We reap what we deserve and sometimes what we don't deserve. There are lots of people who love each other and can't get along maintaining a healthy relationship, so they separate and find happiness sharing their lives with other people. It doesn't mean there wasn't love. To maintain a relationship, love alone is not enough. In this case, I believe that Adolf always loved Lewis, otherwise he would not have become physically and mentally ill. He realized too late that relationships need to know how to maintain them and that life partners are not objects. However, I think it's still a sad situation, especially since it was all his fault. ivan hates adolf and the last time he saw him he looked at him "with pitiful eyes" ... empathy does these things. "ivan was the second option" ivan was not the second option and I think that was what hurt him the most. Until the end, Ivan was never an option for Lewis. Ivan was able to accompany Lewis until the end and showed that he was fine with it. It could have had a different ending, but I think this ending had a huge impact. It really makes you cry. It was the second time I read it and I still cried more than the first time
@pew pew A mistake is when you step on someone's foot. Ra** and physical abuse (of Troy as well) is not a mistake, it's a crime and not forgiveable. And unfortunately, a lot of people get away with it and don't get what they deserve in real life but even in this story. This piece of sh** seems healthy now, has a dog and gets to travel the world, while Lewis was never allowed to have these things because of him. How is that justice or getting what he deserves.
@Hellhound Maybe you realize that the word "mistake" was used to say that because we make mistakes doesn't mean we don't love. you ignored the part where I said he forgot to ferment the relationship and that partners are not objects. You also forgot to do a general analysis of what I wrote and conclude that the entire first part of the comment was to justify why people felt sorry for him. I get to be very clear “empathy does this things”. It's not my opinion. they are facts. In my comment I never said that what he did was excusable or that what he suffered was enough. "this piece of sh** seems healthy now" according to who? In my comment you don't find a single word saying that violence, whether physical or psychological, is healthy. Taking the word "mistake" and analyzing an entire comment ignoring the contradictions to that word seems simple, but this is the interpretation of someone who didn't read my comment in the right conditions.
I'm glad you at least have that opinion Good readings🙂
@pew pew empathy has it's limits and ML is way past that limit. Feeling too much empathy is just as toxic and unhealthy as feeling too little. It leads to forgiving dangerous people who endanger others and never change. I might've felt some empathy for him if he had a proper redemption arc and suffered, but he didn't. His final letter is selfish and self absorbed. He barely talks about what he did wrong and only focuses on his wants and needs. His demand for MC to come back shows that he still doesn't respect MC's wishes. It was also a mistake on the creators part to focus solely on MC's suffering, illness and death, and only have ML's regret as a footnote in the story. I wanted to see more, then I might feel a bit bad for him. I also think the "delusional" trope is stupid. I don't know why Chinese witers think being delusional is the highest form of suffering, when it isn't. Your brain makes you delusional to protect you from a traumatising truth. As long as he doesn't accept the truth fully, he won't be able to make amends, suffer and take responsibility properly. In my opinion, a redemption arc can only be truly satisfying if the ML goes through it fully conscious, with a clear mind, otherwise it's way too easy. And him doing all the things MC was never allowed to do is not romantic or sad, just a slap on the face for MC's memory and suffering.
